Anger. Persons with BPD feel emotion more intensely than others which are especially evident in their anger outbursts. When they can no longer resist the diagnosis, the go-to emotion is anger which is frequently taken out on family members or anyone who tried to help along the way. Sadly, their response leads to further isolation from others activating an intense uncontrollable fear of abandonment. Others are confused by the pushing away with anger followed by the pulling in when feeling abandoned. Thereby triggering the next stage.
Depression. Deep sadness over feeling alone, misunderstood, and rejected by others settles into the person with BPD. This is precisely when another characteristic of suicidality becomes apparent. Not only is the person with BPD just now beginning to comprehend the vast difference between the level of intense feeling they possess in comparison to others but they are also grasping at huge missed opportunities and relationships. The impact of their disorder on others has hit them very hard. The period of time between depression and acceptance is different for everyone. But the depression is needed to spark the motivation to move forward.