The next morning I rolled over in bed next to Keri and asked, “How can I make your day better?”
Keri looked at me angrily. “What?”
“How can I make your day better?”
“You can’t,” she said. “Why are you asking that?”
“Because I mean it,” I said. “I just want to know what I can do to make your day better.
“She looked at me cynically.
“You want to do something? Go clean the kitchen.
“She likely expected me to get mad. Instead, I just nodded. “Okay.”
I got up and cleaned the kitchen.
The next day I asked the same thing. “What can I do to make your day better?”
Her eyes narrowed. “Clean the garage.”
I took a deep breath. I already had a busy day and I knew she had made the request in spite. I was tempted to blow up at her.
Instead, I said, “Okay.” I got up and for the next two hours and cleaned the garage. Keri wasn’t sure what to think. The next morning came.
“What can I do to make your day better?
Evans continued this approach until his wife fully understood what he was doing and adopted a similar approach in her interactions with him. Of course, once they developed better communication skills, they didn’t need to ask each other this question each morning. They simply knew.