What Does Narcissistic Abuse Look Like?

Narcissistic Tactics

  • Extreme Affection

This approach is generally implemented at the beginning of the relationship and involves grand gestures of love and adoration in bursts.

  • Strategic Grooming

As the relationship progresses, narcissists progressively isolate their partner by emphasizing a unique and powerful connection that his or her partner lacks in other relationships

  • Lying

This one’s pretty self-explanatory. Narcissists are often pathological liars, both consciously and subconsciously. They will go to any extent to isolate their partners from their family and friends by lying and manipulating them so that they begin to mistrust everyone except for the NPD or ADP individual.

  • Hoovering

A relationship with a man or woman who meets the criteria for NPD or APD is exhausting and suffocating. Narcissists absorb all of their partner’s time while often controlling every aspect of their lives, up to when they eat and sleep.

Victims of Narcissistic Abuse

Like victims of any type of abuse (emotional, physical, verbal, etc.), men and women who have been in these types of relationship are subject to intensive counseling. Rather than recognizing the emotional abuse and consequential damage, patients are completely focused on their own flaws and weaknesses that have been exaggerated by the narcissist. Victims are self-critical and blame themselves for the narcissist’s behavior. Rather than focusing on their own healing, they seek help for how to improve in order to help their narcissist partner. Denial of the abuse and self-blame for the behavior dominates the mindset of the patient and the conversation between patient and therapist.

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