Two: Take Back Your Confidence
There’s no time like the present to take back what your narcissistic spouse or ex-spouse has stolen and it all starts with regaining your confidence.
If you are going to try to remain married to a narcissist you’ll need to be able to wear that confidence to deflect all of the arrows that he is going to be shooting at you. It’s what he does and it’s probably not going to stop. Having confidence allows you to look at what he’s saying and see it for the lie that it is. Confidence will also allow you to remain calm in the midst of an argument when he is using a tactic like gas lighting to break you down.
Three: Channel Your Inner Queen
One thing that we tend to do for the narcissists in our lives is to give them the best. I can’t tell you how many meals I have skipped so there would be enough food for everyone, or how many pleasantries I’ve given up to “bless my husband”. I now have a particular hatred for those words and the blog posts that contain them.
It’s time to draw the line to servant-hood in this case and it’s going to cause some major friction. Give yourself permission to sweep the cream off of the top once in a while. This can be a lot more difficult than you might think because you’ve gotten in the habit of always taking the crumbs that were left after he feasted. When you let yourself take the best once in a while you’ll be reminded that you are important – just as important as he is.