Does this sound familiar?
You recently settled into a vague sense of security after the narcissist swore on their mother’s grave that they wouldn’t (insert relationship crime) again, yet you discovered they broke their sacred promise.
Consequently, you not only loathe the narcissist, you loathe yourself for falling for their lies once more. You feel the punch of indignation in your gut and your fight-or-flight reaction kicks into overdrive.
Why the heck do they do it? Do they get some sick enjoyment out of it? Is it to prove to themselves (and you) that they can do anything they want and you’ll keep taking them back? Is it their sadistic sense of entitlement?
Among the horrid relationship crimes that one endures from the narcissist in their life, habitually broken promises are the worst. Why? Well, for one, it’s futile to blame a narcissist for being a narcissist. After all, they have a track record of being habitual liars. We can’t really expect them to change when they’ve given no indication that they can be trusted.
More importantly, though, these repeat offenses lead to learned helplessness, depression, and C-PTSD.