8. You will need to re-learn that taking care of yourself is important. Even if you already knew this, it’s hard to remember when the person you love is struggling so much. You can’t be calm, loving, patient or gentle with your partner or yourself if all your mental and emotional energy is going toward the other person. You don’t want your relationship to start feeling like a caretaking role — and trust me, neither does your partner. So remember to include what nourishes you every day. I go on 4-mile runs a few times a week, write, read novels and talk to my girlfriends and my mom. I spend a lot of time being ridiculous and laughing!